drunk, gay Asian man in pink shirt and blue blazer screaming into iPhone:
“… so, you’ll never believe what happened to me today… [silence]… i hit a fucking pedestrian and dragged him 25 feet! [silence] i know!! un-fucking believable! i mean, i was going up the hill along the sidewalk and… yeah, and i was turning into my driveway, and you know, my car doesn’t have the best fucking brakes, and i was about to get hit so i fucking sped up and, next thing i knew he was fucking hanging on underneath… and you know what the best part is? [silence] he was Mexican! [silence] so, yeah, he like, didn’t want me to call the police or anything… [silence] yeah, he kept saying they would just ship him back! yeah! [silence] so, i offered him $10,000, you know, to take care of the medical bills, and everything… [silence] i know, but he wouldn’t fucking take it!!! how fucked up is that?! [silence] yeah…”
have you ever had one of those moments when you were really fucking tired, and you were waiting for the next train home, when suddenly you are willing to forgo the next train for a later one, in order to hear the end of someone else’s conversation? i almost had one of those. at least i heard the best part.
